True Refuge Read online

  ‘Not yet,’ he finally murmured. He turned back to Nick, his gaze roving over the cotton t-shirt that stretched over the rippling, ropy muscles and bronze skin. Nick’s purging from the previous night meant that he could move their relationship forward. But he ignored the surge of longing that burst through him, squashed it like he squashed the fear, the anger, the undefined and unacknowledged helplessness. Instead he asked a question. The most important question at that moment. ‘Can you fix it?’

  Nick turned his head to meet his gaze. There was no humour in his eyes. ‘Easily. I’ll head back up to the house and get what I need. You wanna come?’

  He did, but he shook his head instead. ‘I’m gonna do another round of the periphery. I’ll head on up later. You doing lunch?’

  Nick’s lips kicked up.

  ‘You bet.’

  Despite the uncertainty and trepidation that swirled sickeningly in the pit of his stomach, Euan let his lips pull into a small smile. ‘Good.’

  Nick offered Euan a mock solute before he took a Sig Sauer P938 from the holster at his hip and palmed the grip. Euan’s smile faded at the reminder of the reality of their situation.

  As he watched Nick disappear into the trees, he ran his hand over the rough bark of the tree. His eyes unfocused and he leaned forward to let his head rest against the trunk’s coarse, uneven surface. He felt fear. Real, candid fear. He was terrified at what that cut wire meant. They were no longer safe here, but when he turned his eyes to once again move over the ravaged driveway, he wondered if they had ever been safe. He felt nauseated by the close proximity of Nirvana and all the depraved minions of the anarchist Mickey-O who resided there. He remembered all the tribulations they had suffered to get to this point. Kira had been right the night before. Everything they had endured so far had led them right here. Divine intervention? Fate? Euan still believed it was sheer dumb luck. But he couldn’t put the thought aside, and as he began to stalk through the undergrowth, the thick canopy of trees filtering the heat of late summer sun, the mulch crunching under his feet, he realised it didn’t matter how they ended up here. All that was important was that they remained together, safe and whole.

  After hours of searching for a clue to their enemy, and finding nothing but a burning resentment over their predicament, Euan decided to head back towards the house.

  Kira was in her garden, grasping handfuls of lavender stalks and cutting them free at the base of the plant with a pair of pruning shears. As he watched from the shadows of the trees, she quickly tied each bunch with twine before placing it in a pile beside her.

  Letting his gaze linger, he couldn’t help the thoughts that swirled inside his head. She was astounding. So effortlessly glorious. The vision of her still sent shockwaves of electrifying promise through him. Her movements deft and sure, each batch she gathered was symmetrical, each cut at the base of the stems efficient and effective. Apart from the odd swipe at her nose or forehead to remove the light sheen of sweat from her exertions, she didn’t pause, her project her only focus.

  She wore a pair of low-riding shorts, and a frayed straw hat that valiantly tried to keep her wayward waves from dancing in the soft breeze and to shield her eyes from the sun. The threadbare faded pink tank top barely concealed her midriff, and though she wore hiking boots, and had a twin to Nick’s Sig Sauer strapped to her hip, she was otherwise completely unprotected and defenseless. Vulnerable, and undeniably feminine.

  Her bare arms and exposed neckline, the fabric of her worn shirt gaping every time she bent to expose her cleavage, had his ire, and his cock, rising.

  When she bent once more, showcasing the lush curve of a breast, he took a deep calming breath and pushed himself out of the trees and into the light. His long legs ate up the distance between them and he was almost upon her before she noticed.

  How many times had she completed this duty? Was she always so focused? So oblivious to the world around her?

  The male beast inside him raged at the thoughts.

  ‘What made you approach us that day?’ he asked when she finally looked up, tipping her straw hat in the process and raising her blonde eyebrows in surprise at his close proximity.

  ‘It doesn’t matter now,’ she mumbled, returning to her task.

  Euan frowned at her elusiveness and moved closer to her where she was surrounded by a seemingly endless sea of tiny purple flowers. When he reached her, she stood and he didn’t hesitate to palm her cheek, encasing almost half her face in his large hand.

  Euan took his time to memorise her features. He wanted her innocence to imprint on his heart. That unfettered purity that could not be faked. His calloused thumb ran along her cheekbone and into the gossamer hairline, hidden under her hat. ‘Tell me, sweetheart.’

  Kira swallowed, and Euan narrowed his eyes at the apprehension that suddenly washed through her features.

  Her whisper was solemn. ‘You aren’t the first men to pass through here,’ she told him.

  Euan jerked at her words. He felt as though the ground opened under his feet, the heat of the underworld licking at his boots, scorching his soles. Of course they weren’t, the cut wire was testament to that, but why had no one approached the house?

  ‘When?’ he breathed, his voice deceptively calm considering the calamity tumbling inside him.

  She considered him a heartbeat further before she continued. ‘Not for a while. That was until there were two men a week or so before you came.’

  Euan wanted to be sick. Every instinct was screaming inside his mind. He found it almost hard to breathe through the fear that closed around his throat. His resolute gaze prompted her to continue.

  Her voice was breathy. ‘When I saw them, they scared me.’

  His hand flinched but she continued.

  ‘They didn’t look like you and Nick. When I saw you two, there was a closeness about you, a gentleness. These men were hard, skinny. They didn’t see me or anything and I let them pass.’ She paused. ‘It was to the east, up on a rise. I can show you, if you like?’

  Her innocent question had his heart racing. It was a response he respected. No fucking way was his girl heading into trees without an army to protect her.

  ‘No, sweetheart,’ he murmured, finding it surprisingly hard to move his body from being pressed against hers. ‘Let’s get inside, yeah? Nick said he was cooking lunch.’

  Kira frowned, also unmoving. ‘Did you find something today? Is the camera okay?’

  Euan swallowed against the disgust he felt in lying to her. ‘An animal chewed on the wire. Nick has likely already fixed it,’ he answered, almost truthfully.

  Kira turned so her face was no longer in his hand. He missed the warmth, the connection.

  ‘That’s why I approached you.’ Kira’s words pulled him from his thoughts, answering his earlier question. ‘In the beginning. I can protect myself. I can, but Will was better at it. Those men were frightening, and I was scared about what would happen if I remained alone and they found this place, or if they found me.’

  Euan’s stomach clenched at the thought. ‘Sweetheart …’

  Kira’s gaze was earnest. ‘You don’t say much about what is out there. How bad everything has become. But I understand. I do. I know what my limitations are.’

  She didn’t. Not fully. And Euan was glad for it. He took a deep breath, squashing the trepidation that was rising inside him like a tide. ‘I know you do,’ he lied.

  A tiny furrow creased her brow. ‘They passed through. They didn’t stop. I promise.’

  He tilted her hat up with the tip of one finger so he could hold her gaze uninterrupted. ‘I believe you.’

  Kira stood before him, her manner a physical representation of not only everything feminine and beautiful, but of strength, courage and determination—and an incredibly intuitive nature. Her next words solidified his beliefs.

  ‘You have to appreciate me not just as a woman, but as a partner in this. This is my home too,’ she told him.

  Euan swallow
ed but remained mute in the face of her uncompromising resolve.

  ‘I trust you, Euan,’ she continued, her eyes glittering with purpose. ‘I need you to trust me.’

  Christ. His stomach twisted, squeezed. He nodded slowly and shifted his gaze until it settled back towards the trees in the direction of where the camera was hidden with its ominous severed wire. To where Nirvana resided and the long-lost tracks of the men who had passed through. How could he capitulate to her demands? It went against every protective instinct he had. All the intrinsic values that made him into the man he was. He’d built his belief system on protecting those who were weaker and smaller than him. But when he thought of Kira and Nick, he realised that their physical bodies had nothing to do with the strength that resided in their hearts, their souls.

  He’d go against his nature for Nick. He’d tell the young man he loved him every day if that was what he needed. In that moment, he realised with painful clarity, he’d also go against his nature for Kira too. He would acknowledge that the strength and stamina of a woman didn’t just come from her body, but from her tenacious will.

  But as much as he wanted to, he couldn’t make the change instantaneously.

  When he felt the internal strength to turn his attentions back to her, he met her gaze head on.

  ‘Give me time, sweetheart,’ he requested, sharing the truth about his ability to change a battle raging inside of him. ‘It goes against everything I am to do that. I want to … I will. I just need time. Time to think. Yeah?’

  He felt the burn of her assessment acutely, her blue eyes searing his skin. ‘But you will tell me. When you’re ready. You’ll involve me and let me be a part of keeping our home and us safe?’

  He breathed in deeply, held the air in his chest. ‘If that’s what you want.’

  Kira’s gaze held his. He felt a sudden urge to kneel at her feet in the face of such fortitude. ‘It’s what I need,’ she confirmed without hesitation.

  Euan nodded. ‘Then I will, I promise.’

  ‘Okay,’ she conceded, also nodding.

  Euan emptied the pent-up breath he’d held in his lungs. ‘Okay. Come on, let’s head down. I’m hungry.’

  Kira pushed passed the anxiety that circled them and tilted her lips up in a mischievous smile. ‘You’re always hungry.’

  Euan fed off the change in her demeanor and let his gaze linger over her body, the sparse clothes that she wore, her exposed skin. ‘You have no idea,’ he told her pointedly.

  She giggled breathlessly as she turned to do as she was bid. He watched her retreating back, a war raging inside him. He knew without a doubt that he needed to protect something so infinitely precious, but he also knew with painful clarity that he needed to tell her of the dangers that prowled at her door.

  Chapter 23

  Euan stared at the small monitor, both screens now operable and showing the motionless trees via night vision. Not a breath of wind rustled the leaves, no nocturnal animal scampered in the undergrowth. The picture had no sound, only a visual, but he knew the forest would be silent.

  At the discovery of the severed wire, and at the not unexpected but still shocking revelation that Kira had divulged about the men who had prowled through her forest, the iron ball inside Euan’s stomach had exploded into a thousand poisonous shards of metal, piercing and maiming his insides.

  He didn’t know who had cut the wire, but he knew, without a doubt, who the two men were who had passed the house not even a week before them.

  It couldn’t be anyone else.

  Parker and Rodgers. The motherfuckers who had brutalised Nick.

  His need for vengeance raged, his thirst for blood was all-consuming. He wanted to see them finally pay for everything they had done to Nick. Even though their trail would be cold, he was once again torn in deciding which road to follow. He saw the paths before him; his need to enact revenge, fleeing to search out further sanctuary, or staying put and fighting.

  His mind was a tumultuous tornado of conflicting thoughts. But on three things, he was certain.

  He would never leave Nick and Kira behind, no matter how thirsty he was for blood.

  Running into the wilderness without a plan had only led them to Nirvana.

  His only option now was to stand and battle against rising evil that was threatening to swallow humanity, and protect the people he cared for until his dying breath.

  The plots, tactics and strategies he had devised mapped a plan for a war, but he had no army at his disposal, and the prospect terrified him.

  ‘You okay in here, big man?’ Nick asked through a yawn from behind him.

  Euan took his eyes from the screen to where Nick leaned one shoulder on the door frame, his gaze wandering over his disheveled hair, his bright eyes, his bare chest and swollen lips.

  He wasn’t surprised. An unspoken agreement had them staying underground for the remainder of the day, and Nick had taken advantage of the respite. Euan had watched from the periphery, an erection straining in his pants, while the other two had teased and provoked each other into a sexual frenzy of unfulfilled lust.

  They held each other’s gazes. Nick no longer had any of the physical reminders of the attack, and after his purging, the emotional triggers were becoming less common. There was no mask, no wall, no shadows. His body was on glorious display, unadorned by hang-ups of his past. He’d put on enough weight that he’d almost filled out into his peak condition, his muscular torso and rippled abs creating shadows over his bronze skin. Euan had told Nick he loved him, and he did, unconditionally, but there was now a little blonde fairy who was wiggling her way into his heart with the intention of staying there and setting up house.

  But he was too overwhelmed by the revelations of the day to involve himself in their antics.

  Euan’s heart was heavy as he spoke. ‘I just want to keep you two safe, yeah? As best I can.’

  ‘Hey.’ Nick walked over, bent and took Euan’s lips in soft, gentle kiss. That scent, so pure and masculine. That taste, like sunshine, beauty. Like Kira.

  ‘I can think of no one else who’s better equipped,’ Nick continued, his tone suddenly husky.

  ‘I know there are lot of threats. But there always were, and there likely always will be now. Today has been a good day, let’s move this forward. I’m ready.’

  Euan pulled away and sighed heavily, shaking his head while he rubbed his face with his hands. ‘You sure?’

  Nick placed his hands on Euan’s shoulders. His jade eyes were a vibrant green, flashing, yearning. ‘I’m sure.’

  He let his hands fall and studied the man in front of him, taking a deep breath. He didn’t have any answers. He didn’t have a plan or a direction. His chest was tight and his hands clammy. But it was time.

  His lips quirked as he ignored the writhing snakes of uncertainty that still twisted inside his belly. ‘Twisted my arm.’

  Nick chuckled wickedly. ‘Knew you’d see reason eventually.’

  ***

  Euan could hear Kira as he walked silently down the hallway. The rhythmic rustle of the sheets as well as the almost imperceptible gasps and pants of breath indicated what she was busy undertaking while she had a few moments alone.

  The small night-light was on, so the room was awash in the soft illumination. Before Euan became visible through the doorway, he paused and listened, Nick pulling up quietly behind him.

  Kira’s near-silent gasps had his cock thickening in his jeans. He craved the sight of her, the flush fanning out from her cheeks down to her chest. He wanted to watch her bite her bottom lip to suppress the moans of pleasure, enjoy seeing her brow crease with concentration.

  View her hand fluttering between her thighs.

  Euan knew Nick had built her up, left her wanting. She was likely wet and needy, and now it seemed she was taking the small moment alone to take the edge off her desperation.

  Not if he had anything to say about it.

  He let his broad shoulders and tall frame become visible throug
h the door.

  ‘New rule, Kira,’ he said as he rumbled into the room, watching with masochistic delight as she snapped her legs closed, her horrified eyes widening in terror at being discovered.

  ‘You no longer can touch that pussy without my permission, understand?’

  Embarrassment held her immobile. She lay on her back, her tangle of hair spread out on the pillow in a gossamer labyrinth. Her knees were bent, feet flat on the mattress. The bedding was a mess around her where she had kicked it from her body in a heated fit.

  Her delicate hand was trapped between her clamped thighs. In her haste, she hadn’t taken the time to remove her fingers from the damp crotch of her panties before she’d locked her legs tight.

  He took a step into the room, and her muscles coiled tighter. Euan could smell her erotic musk and his nostrils flared instinctually at the scent. He was having trouble bringing his baser impulses to heel.

  When he next spoke, his voice was so deep and foreboding that he felt the quiver of Nick’s muscles where he pressed his shoulder to his behind him.

  ‘Understand me?’ he demandingly repeated.

  Kira’s crystal-blue eyes were still wild and frightened, but behind the shock, Euan could see the small flicker of flame that signified her stubbornness.

  He waited for her to disagree and to shake her head.

  Instead, he watched with growing intensity when, in reply, she slowly nodded against the sheets and removed her hand from between her thighs. She curled her fingers into a fist and held it tightly to the three little buttons at her chest.

  He let a feral grin split across his face. Fuck him. He didn’t think he’d ever seen a more rousing sight.

  She blinked at him and her lips parted in awe.

  ‘Open your legs, Kira,’ he commanded, his voice vibrating another octave lower.

  Kira held still for a number of heartbeats, his desire for her to capitulate to his demands saturating the room. She licked her lips and that time, he knew she did it provocatively.